Yeah, I know I've been dead for a long time. But I just wanted to keep a low profile, some time for myself to reflect through things and to get over some things...of course, I've been sick and am recovering.

Is it too much to ask to go overseas so that I can get away from my nightmares of school?Everytime I sleep, it's always something about school. I badly want to find myself a sanctuary where I know I can escape from anything and everything that haunts me and nothing is ever going to hurt me there. No, I'm not trying to be philosophical or angsty here, neither am I cooking up some poetic stuff, I'm just...well...I don't know. I've got to update my blog right? What crap am I talking about anyway?

I need to get in touch with myself...who has ever heard of one being cold to oneself? But everytime I sit down and have some quiet time to myself, something or someone is bound to interrupt me. So what can I do? I just spend most of my time in the toilet and tell my mum I've been having a lot of stomachaches. Haha, what a pathetic idea. Even the toilet has lost its appeal.

Hence, I sit in front of my computer and fulfil my ultimate dream of rotting and drooling in front of the screen. But after a while, the computer has lost its appeal to and drooling ruins my reputation in my family's eyes. So what am I suppose to do to pass my time?

Anyways. Today, I looked through my photo albums. I noticed that as people get older, they tend to...lose something. I don't know, it's like a part of their life has been sucked out of them or something. Their eyes loose that freshness, that...vitality of life. And it's scary because I wonder why this happens. Stress? Is it because of me that my parents look that way? Or is it just part and parcel of the process of life? Then does that mean they're dying? Well...everyone is dying every minute of the day.

Am I paranoid?

Whatever, I don't want to think about it anymore.